Monicherrie

Hey everyone, long time no update.. I'm so sorry since school has been very tedious and I am fully overwhelmed with how my first year of college life is picking up. I am guilty of being extremely busy during my free time since I have not been drawing (digitally) seriously. Come 3 more years and I am considering going to med school. It blows me however; I've grown up molded as an artist-- one who can use pictures and words to convey and express. But what am I doing? I've been thrown into the world of cold, hard facts which are close to interpretation and devoid of creativity; I feel like I'm trapped. I feel like it was a mistake I became a Bachelor of Science student. I am not juggling my tasks in school very well because of this crisis; I feel like I should be expressing and creating like the art and writing students of my university. I feel like I should have been one of them.
BS Psychology was a course chosen by my father in hopes of me graduating with a degree, getting a title and access to an array of jobs. I blindly complied since I felt like the study of human behavior seems interesting and promising enough. Don't get me wrong; I love the study of psychology. It's just that the subjects I am forced to take do not play any importance in my interest and relevance in the work field of a psych grad. Too much science and all the facts made me think more logical than the creative self I love and know. Because of this, my art block has been walling me up from what I love doing-- that is to draw.
Flyingcatsandglitter has been known as a fan artist; she is best known as a MLP gijinka artist. I love drawing these. I love making fan art. But one day, I looked at my portfolio. Lovely, cute and colorful works that felt-- empty, and alien to me. What was I doing, I thought. I realized that I'm drawing for the sake of recognition and popularity. I let my fans decide what I do and draw (not that anything is wrong with that), disregarding my feelings for art all these time. I enjoy creating these pieces, it's just that they lack something-- and that something is the essence and embodiment of my art-- my feelings.
I can only draw, I have no right to call myself an artist.
I accept that fact, that's why I am willing to change that now. I want to be happy, content and inspired with the things I am creating-- I want my new pieces to be emotional and brimming with life. I will not stop creating fan art though, but this time I want to focus my time and creativity in creating art for myself. Art that embodies my soul and what I am feeling as of the moment. I want to be unique and empowering; I want to show that in my art. By the end of February up to present, I am feeling the rush of creativity welling up inside of me; I spend days just drawing, coloring freely, some works accompanied by little passages and lengthy poems. Don't think; just feel. This has been my new motto in approaching art, and I couldn't be happier. I've returned to the use of traditional art tools-- watercolors and markers. So far, I've been drawing a lot of things outside my comfort zone and I actually see how much improvement there's been - still life, realistic, architecture and landscapes. I am happy right now; my art is finally speaking and telling a story. I couldn't wait to share them with you guys, who has long supported me and believed how much potential I have. I will never forget the love I am constantly receiving from the people who appreciate my art.

I am very inspired, my art embodies who I truly am. Finally, after 17 years, I have found my purpose in creating.
I think I am finally living up to my title as an "artist."